Repentance and Forgiveness

Talk to your kids about the need to both repent when their actions are hurtful or wrong, but also the need to forgive. Emphasize how harmful it is not to forgive others and that it is a commandment. Forgiveness opens our hearts and allows peace to enter in. Forgiving ourselves is also important!

Quotes:

In most families, where there are almost daily interpersonal transgressions, repentance and forgiveness need to be ongoing.

Mental health experts acknowledge that it is impossible to address emotional and physical well-being without considering the relevance of repentance and forgiveness.

Dallin H. Oaks: “The gospel of Jesus Christ challenges us to change. … Repenting means giving up all of our practices – personal, family, ethnic, and national – that are contrary to the commandments of God. The purpose of the gospel is to transform common craters into celestial citizens, and that requires change.”

“And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.” (Mark 11:25-26) 

Richard G. Scott: Forgiveness – although it is “most difficult” – as “the sure path to peace and healing.”

Gordon B. Hinckley: Forgiveness “may be the greatest virtue on earth, and certainly the most needed.”

Individuals and families who are able to forgive important transgressions are likely to have better emotional and physical health, and positive emotions improve health in a variety of ways.

The emotions associated with unforgiveness, such as resentment, hostility, blame, and fear, have been linked to health risks.

Neal A. Maxwell: repentance is “a Greek word which means ‘a change of mind,’ such as changing one’s view of himself, God, the universe, life, others, and so on.” In attempting to repent, “we are actually progressing toward what Paul called ‘the mind of Christ’.”

Richard G. Scott: “The ability to have an unsettled conscience is a gift of God to help you cussed in this mortal life.”

 

For victims, forgiveness means being released from anger and developing empathy for the offender. This implies a change of heart and a change in expectations – there will be no later recriminations or paybacks.

Genuine forgiveness is a process, not a product. It is hard work and it takes time. It is a voluntary act that gives meaning to the wound and frees the injured person from the ills of bitterness and resentment.

Richard G. Scott: “The beginning of healing requires childlike faith in the unalterable fact that Father in Heaven loves you and has supplied a way to heal. His Beloved Son, Jesus Christ, laid down His life to provide that healing. But there is no magic solution, no simple balm to provide healing, nor is there an easy path to the complete remedy. The cure requires profound faith in Jesus Christ and in His infinite capacity to heal.”

Forgiveness is an important part of the healing process. All victims need to be relieved of the burden of resentment and the entanglements of a painful relationship. “No victim will benefit, psychologically or morally from clinging to a resentful sense of her own victimhood and dwelling on the past.”

Repentance and forgiveness are divine expectations that are particularly relevant to family life. The question is not if forgiveness should take place, but how?

In the end, sincere repentance and genuine forgiveness are gifts from God made possible through the Atonement of Christ.